S.H.O. Tells...Shamanics of Laughter
It Was Just (Really Only?) An Accident!
posted Thursday, 26 October 2006
More funny excuses from Companion Marshall's inbox to ours:
It Was Just An Accident!
The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where drivers
attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words
possible:
Coming home, I drove into wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
I thought my window was down, but found it was up when I put my head through it.
The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
I collided with a stationary car going the other way.
A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I
hit him.
I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and
headed over the embankment.
In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached
an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision, and I did not see the
other car.
I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an
accident.
I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint
gave way causing me to have an accident.
As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where
no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid
the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the
pedestrian.
My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my hat found
that I had a fractured skull.
I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the curb
when I struck him.
The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its
way when it struck the front end. I was thrown from the car as it left the
road. I was later found in the ditch by some stray cows.
The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a
big mouth.
The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
It Was Just An Accident!
The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where drivers
attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words
possible:
Coming home, I drove into wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
I thought my window was down, but found it was up when I put my head through it.
The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
I collided with a stationary car going the other way.
A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I
hit him.
I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and
headed over the embankment.
In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached
an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision, and I did not see the
other car.
I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an
accident.
I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint
gave way causing me to have an accident.
As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where
no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid
the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the
pedestrian.
My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my hat found
that I had a fractured skull.
I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the curb
when I struck him.
The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its
way when it struck the front end. I was thrown from the car as it left the
road. I was later found in the ditch by some stray cows.
The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a
big mouth.
The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
Hello, hello - what do YOU know?
